Our thanks to E for editing this piece (video, 16:38) from a number of video sources, including his own. The (Kiwi) policeman who arrested me was the personification of charm and patience, and the ensuing couple of hours were not without their comic moments. He was accompanied by a young policewoman, and at the police station I was taken to, he gently prompted her to give a verbal account of events preceding my arrest to the (female) desk sergeant. I wish I had a recording of the ensuing scene, which went like this:

Policewoman: Mr Buchanan stepped out into the road into the path of oncoming traffic, despite my colleague having warned him many times that if he did that, he’d be arrested.

Desk Sergeant: Where did the arrest take place?

Policewoman: Trafalgar Square.

Policeman (eyes closed): Parliament Square.

Policewoman (stony-faced): Parliament Square.

You can’t buy memories like that.

We’re hoping to invest in a high-spec video camera, radio microphones etc., so the quality of our videos and associated audio will rise sharply. If you’d like to support the purchase of this equipment with a donation, we should be very grateful. You can do so here. Thank you.