Our thanks to J for pointing us to yet another story for the ‘You couldn’t make this s*** up!’ file.
The Thomas the Tank Engine books were written by the Reverend Wilbert Awdry, an English vicar, in the 1940s. Here we have shadow transport secretary Mary Creagh MP convincingly presenting the case for there to be fewer female MPs:
Ms Creagh has clearly been overdosing on the Stupid pills. Let’s analyse a few extracts from the article:
‘There is a preponderance of men in the transport industry and I am very keen to unpack some of the myths that stop women from taking up what are often highly-paid and highly-skilled jobs,’ she said.
Ah, that’s it, highly-paid jobs. She doesn’t care about the ‘preponderance of men’ in – say – the low-paid waste disposal industry, one must assume.
Ms Creagh said that the tales of the little blue steam engine should follow the example of CBeebies series Underground Ernie, which features a main character called Victoria.
She also suggested that train companies could up the numbers of female drivers by advertising in women’s interest magazines, or offering more part-time posts.
Advertising in women’s interest magazines. Yes, I can see Ms Fawcett idly flicking through her new copy of Bolshy Harpy Monthly and penning an application after spotting the advert.
Offering more part-time posts. Yes, that would make sense. There’s nothing quite like increasing the number of female employees (part-time ones, in particular) to increase the effectiveness and efficiency of organisations, is there? Such a success in the NHS.
Let’s introduce some FACTS into this, shall we?
Four in seven unemployed people are men.
Unemployment is a bigger driver of suicide among men than among women.
Three times more men than women commit suicide every year in the UK.
Suicide is the #1 cause of death of young men.
Many young men would jump at the chance to become train drivers.
Here are three alternative ideas for Ms Creagh to consider once the effects of her Stupid pills have worn off:
Save long-suffering taxpayers’ money by NOT advertising in women’s interest magazines. British men pay 72% of the income taxes paid in the UK, women only 28%.
Don’t offer more part-time posts.
Preference unemployed young men, and unemployed men who’d previously been their families’ primary breadwinners, to become train drivers and work full-time.
MPs are about to be awarded significant salary increases. If Ms Creagh were on the minimum wage, she’d be overpaid. Maybe it’s time to add another category of awards to our ‘Whiny Woman of the Month’ and ‘Harpy’ awards:
Stupid Woman of the Month
So many obvious contenders. Ms Creagh could be the inaugural winner. Harriet Harman would, of course, receive a Lifetime Achievement award, to sit on her mantelpiece right next to her ‘Harpy’ Lifetime Achievement award: