Yesterday we posted a link to an article, Former Vogue editrix Gabriella Karefa-Johnson stormed out of first-class plane cabin as all the other passengers were ‘white middle-aged men’: ‘I just downgraded myself’. Our thanks to Nigel for posting the following comments in relation to another article, ‘I didn’t let my wife come to my brother’s wedding because she wanted to wear a white dress’:

“I presume she wasn’t paying for her seat herself. And declared that she had to move for her “mental health”. The latter an indication of the trivial feelings that have become “mental health” in recent years. This story [J4MB: The second link, above.] is indicative of the female determination to elevate the trivial into a major issue.

For a start all the many “rules” about weddings (meaning just the day) are recent inventions by women. Most to do with their fragile egos. Not upstaging the Bride, competition between mothers and mothers in law, hierarchies in Bridesmaids, flowers, favours, venues and on and on. A maelstrom of potential conflict over perceived slights, snobbery, insecurities and moodiness. I feel for the poor Husband, aware of the rules and empathetic to feelings but faced with a wife in full female competition mode. It reminded me so much of managing a mainly female workforce. Endless mountains made out of molehills or indeed nothing at all. “Microaggressions” just another name for the same childish games of women always wanting to be the “star” in their own story.

I imagine the five businessmen were completely oblivious, and their “microaggression” consisted of paying no attention to Ms. “stylist” (how can picking clothes for another person be a job?) and no doubt the male flight attendant forgot the massage her ego by observing he “fabulous” outfit or “amazing” occupation and was merely polite and professional. Frankly men are always likely to be blindsided by “microaggressions” because the vast majority don’t think they are remotely as important or their ego so fragile as to be bothered by trivia. After all no groom is likely to have his day “ruined” by the best man or other male guests being dressed in the same colour!

On the topic of women and weddings, on Michael Macintyre’s “Big Show” last night there was a “send to all segment”. Where a celebrity lets the comedian use their smart phone to send a daft text. Last night it was “Jade” (a pop star) on the show with her mother and long time “partner”. In opening the phone and looking at a “photos” file. He (MacIntyre) finds reams of wedding dresses, paraphernalia and decorations. Much to the audience’s amusement he scrolls on and on never reaching the end of the hundreds of pictures. Hardly surprising as we know women plan their wedding long long before any actual event, I recall my then 13 year old daughter recounting the details of her wedding (and even the colours in her future lounge!). But very telling that there was not one picture of her partner or indeed any male or male outfit. One can’t help thinking that women want a “wedding” rather than a marriage. Does anyone know of any wedding magazines directed at men? Or men with reams of groom’s outfits, table decorations, favours ……. ?”

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