Two days ago, in the wake of the failed assassination attempt against Donald Trump, we published Kimberly Cheatle, Director of the United States Secret Service. There can be no doubt that the attempt represents a nearly catastrophic failure by the US Secret Service. Eli, a former leader of J4MB when we were a political party, writes:

“The Cheetoh Lady who runs the Secret Service told an interviewer that they actually did recognise that the now infamous roof was a vulnerability – but they decided that they could not post snipers up there because it has a slight slant, and that’s just not within Health and Safety requirements for Secret Service operatives, apparently. Glenn Greenwald made a hilarious point: not only was Ree Tardy Oswald able to climb up and do what he needed to quite safely, but even when he was finally fucking shot, his corpse didn’t roll a fucking inch!

Is it because they’re all in heels now? I must admit, sometimes I struggle standing on flat ground in mine.

She might be better suited to the HR dept!”